Motivation

After reading other blogs lately and reflecting on my own blog and how it started as a way of verbalising my frustrations in cycling when most of my racing/training is with males and how can I possibly compete against people who have loads of testosterone that I just don't have.

My recent posts have been in the order of raced well could have been better here but overall happy with blah blah blah....and well really my aim is to get stronger and not just say I raced well, trained hard and I should be happy with that...blah blah....but to really put myself out there and get stronger and experience failure along the way.

What is that you say? A rider who wants to experience failure....well no...not really but to learn and improve we have to make mistakes and push ourselves when sometimes we just have nothing left to give. DONT WE?...I mean don't we????? It is a fact that girls are as interested in sports as boys at a young age, but as they get older they tend to drop out and one of the reasons cited for this is that girls don't receive as much positive reinforcement as boys and don't get to see as many pictures of female role models in the papers and on TV as the boys.

Personally my family is not sports oriented and growing up I received no real encouragement to play sport or be involved in sport. I dropped out of calisthenics as a kid, I never played sport at school except for some primary school stuff and that was it. No encouragement and positive sporting reinforcement and I still carry that a bit now and self doubt sits on my shoulder constantly. Phew this is pretty heavy going......It wasn't until one day I was racing in a duathlon in my sneakers on the bike that someone said "you would probably go ok on the bike" I was 29 and I used to run (and badly....more of a plodder and I am being a realist here....I got fitter, but was never going to threaten anyone running). I did enjoy riding having had a bike until about age 14/15 to ride around. So at age 28 I bought a Cannondale and joined a group of riders in the mornings and it was hard work. I am 41 now and have a coach and a much better bike and set up and everything and love it.

The things that help me are:-
- Getting positive comments from my training friends
- Having a coach who really does believe in me and has a "can do" attitude which rubs off
- My boyfriend races and his family have been around bikes for years and his father has won two world titles (and is the Bill behind my "Bills racing team" theme)
- This blog, believe it or not...I have had so many comments from people I have never met that just make me feel proud of my achievement's at times so thank you so much.

Over the past few years I have raced Masters National Titles and have won two silver medals, one in Time Trialling and one in Track Pursuit in my age group, I have raced World Masters in Sydney on the track and I think I have inspired some people in riding the bike just that little bit better.

I used to be one of those riders that was happy to finish in the bunch or hanging on to the back of the bunch, but I want more now, I want some better results which means hard work. My ultimate goal is in January race the Elite Time Trial here (not masters...just the national title) and ride a good strong time that I am proud of.....Can I win....seriously I would doubt it when people racing this event attend training camps and train in wind tunnels and everything...I want to be there and be proud.

In the meantime I am racing tomorrow at Latrobe City in a 36km handicap, similar to the one I pulled out of two weeks ago when I had my weird episode. I have promised to pull out if I feel funny in any way and hopefully will get to the end this week.

Thats all tonight. I revamped my blog this week...new attitude and hopefully some success tomorrow!